Skip to content

Stella by Stella McCartney

February 15, 2010

Ms Stella McCartney

c/o Paul McCartney

London, England

15.02.10

Dear Ms McCartney

I am writing to you from the popular fragrance blog http://www.heapnose.com to express my recent enjoyment of your original fragrance Stella by Stella McCartney.

As I’m sure you’re aware  www.Heapnose.com has fast become the go-to internet site for all things fragrance related. Our readers are as varied and disparate as our fragrance reviews, hailing from such far flung locations as Toronto, Cardiff, Washington DC, London, Paris, LA and Weston-Super-Mare. The rich diversity amongst Heapnose readers is never more obvious than in the google searches which have led visitors to the Heapnose blog. Yesterday  “is Richard Armitage dating?” and “Guy girl dog threesome” were the order of the day, whereas this Monday morning saw “Digestive biscuits” and “Lesbian games” the mots du jour.

Recent press reports confirm Heapnose’s rising status among fragrance aficionados. I’ll refrain here from quoting yesterday’s articles in the Sunday Times Style Magazine and American Vogue (Thanks Anna, luv u 2) and direct you instead to the smorgasbord of incisive comments left by Heapnose fans on the blog itself. Described by Rita Silvan Editor-in-Chief of Elle Canada magazine as “Funny…which is a good thing” and by my friend Claire G as “Getting much better” Heapnose truly is at the forefront of modern fragrance reviewing – which is why, barely eight years after the release of your eponymous fragrance I chose to wear and review Stella by Stella McCartney on Day 7 of the Heapnose Perfume Diary.

Stella, I can only congratulate you. Choosing a classic fragrance (rose) traditionally associated with old women (piss) was a bold move, but one which you executed with aplomb. Your fragrance succeeds in being both elegant and contemporary, slightly austere yet somehow sexy. Although critics have traditionally objected to your “ugly bovine eyes” and “dour expression,” with regard to this fragrance, and indeed in light of your father’s recent costly divorce, they cannot fault your judgement. You were, after all right about Heather.

You’ll no doubt be pleased to learn that you fared well on all three stages of the stringent Heapnose perfume testing. In the “Effortless Elegance” category you performed moderately well – losing points not on the fragrance itself but rather on your own somewhat try-hard friendships with the now not-so-young Hollywood set. Do you actually like Gwyneth Paltrow? Because nobody else does. For longevity you achieved a solid 6 out of ten, and, in fact your lightweight bottle makes “on-the-go” touch ups so easy that you there’s scope for improving this score over the coming months/years. As for “Can I pronounce (your) name without sounding like a knobhead?” . Stella, you passed with flying colours.

I am also relieved to read of your corporate commitment to lacto-ovo vegetarianism. Heapnose readers will no doubt rest a little easier tonight, safe in the knowledge that no animals, plants or unfertilized eggs were harmed in the making of the Heapnose Perfume Diary Day 7.

Stella, I hope you’ll check in with your friends here at Heapnose from time to time. Ongoing litigation re: the naming of your latest endeavour “Nude” will no doubt prevent you from being a regular Heapnose commentator, but don’t be a stranger.

With all good wishes for the continued success of your clothing emporium, organic skincare line and perfume range

Yours Fragrantly

Heapnose and co.

Advertisements
One Comment leave one →
  1. February 16, 2010 11:15 am

    Hil-fecking-arious.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: